Subscribe RSS FeedLast night, I attened our local BSA Venture Forum meeting. Thee was a guest speaker, talking about what we can do to help our young men achieve their goals. His presentation was educational, thought provoking, and filled with good principles.
One skill he taught, is how to discover the real reasons people make choices. Everyone has two reasons for doing something. The one they tell their friends, and the real one.
When you are trying to help someone, and you ask them why they did or didn’t do something. The first answer will not be the real answer it will be their “social answer”. The next time you are trying to understand someones choice, after you ask why and they respond DO NOT try to solve the problem yet instead ignore their first answer and say “Besides that?”; prepare yourself for a long pause and wait until they respond.
If they don’t respond, prepare for the next time they need help by building your relationship of trust with them.
I like it. That is an interesting philosophy and I’ll have to try it sometime.